Feeling ugly. Lost my boobs.

I lost my boobs to breast cancer 11/30/2018 and I’m feeling really really down. I was fine with losing them the whole time up until I actually lost them. I just need some encouragement. I blurred the picture so it wasn’t as disgusting. Now I feel like crap because I wanted to order a few cute bras to wear once I’m healed but no one makes my size unless I pay an arm and a leg so I feel like even more crap. I feel like less of a woman. I just wanted something frilly to make me feel more feminine but because I’m fat and flat I’m not going to find anything and I just can’t stop crying.