Body Positivity: My Story! Heavier & Happier 😊

I used to have a very horrible eating disorder as you can see in the first picture. I would drink water all day and either eat a nutrigrain bar, cup of yogurt or one slice of turkey sandwich meat and that was it. I would starve myself the rest of the day. This sounds ridiculous to me now, but the feeling of hunger made me feel sexy. I imagined my stomach shrinking when I felt hungry, if that makes sense. I thought I was such hot stuff because my hip bones poked out. I weighed 98lbs because I would absolutely FREAK if I saw 3 digits on the scale when I weighed myself. Well, then I got pregnant with my daughter and knew I had to eat for her. I got up to 163lbs with her (not on purpose, i just craved tons of sweets with her) but after I had her, the weight fell off on its own and I was down to about 117 by my 6 week checkup. By this point, I was over freaking about my weight and really didn’t try to lose any, I just made sure I ate healthily and still drank water. I went on to have 3 boys after her and the same thing happened with weight: just fell off by my 6 week checkups. I guess after a few kids I really didn’t have much time to feed myself between taking care of them and working. Most of my meals consisted of their leftovers lol. Fast forward to now, I just had my 5th baby one month ago, and the weight is staying this time. At first I was a little upset considering it naturally fell off so fast with my other children, but today, my grandmother came over and said she had bought some jeans for me (REAL jeans, she knows I’m still in maternity pants lol) and said she thought I’d like them and if I didn’t she would just return them. (Bless her she’s always thinking of my kids and me) Anyway when I went to try them on I thought to myself “These are adorable but pretty sure my husband could wear them. They look huge.” Lol. I tried them on and they fit! At first I got freaked out like “Wow I must be chubbier than I thought.” But I was looking in the mirror and noticed I actually have an ass now, my face is still a bit rounder than normal for me but I actually like it! All of a sudden looking at myself in the mirror, for the first time in my life I noticed everything that was BEAUTIFUL instead of the things I used to think were huge flaws. I’m in the biggest pant size I’ve ever been in before but I actually LOVE it! Even my booty kind of gives a little jiggle when I walk and my husband’s been calling me “Juicy” lol. 😂 I think I’m probably the healthiest and happiest looking I’ve Ever been. I never thought I’d enjoy being a little bigger than normal for myself but I do, and my husband apparently does too, considering all his butt smacks lately and my new nickname lol. I hope anyone who reads this will go look in the mirror and realize how beautiful they really are instead of their “flaws.” 💕❤️😊 CHEERS TO BODY POSITIVITY!!! 🥂