He doesn't need sex?

the story is ; we've been together for over 5 years, we live together and I'm still his girlfriend even though I moved continents for him to be together lol (Europe > Australia)

Our biggest problem is that I don't feel sexy or attractive to him; I don't feel overall unattractive to others and I can see other guys checking me out but I just can't fell it from him. Wearing sexy lingerie, sending him tasteful nudes and talking doesn't work...

When I tell him I'm horny he just smiles or do nothing - WHAT GUY DOES THAT????!

he very rarely tries to make love with me and even though I tell him that I think man should be the one to mainly (not Always) start the moment or at least show like he want it and desire me then he becomes defensive and says it's not true and its ME who don't show HIM that I want to make love therefore he doesn't try. We can go on like that for a month

I'm ending up thinking about sex all the time and feeling that I really need it but I feel really down about my femininity...

Everything else works in our relationship but just not sex...

I just don't get it, help me :(