I've been going crazy over this for a few weeks. I feel like im breaking and heartbroken. It doesnt make sense but it does at the same time. I'm confused but sure of my feelings. I dont know what to think or feel. I feel so lonely and not happy. I put on this face so that nobody knows. Im embarrassed of how i feel but i know I shouldnt be.

So its a little complicated but I will try to make it simple.

So I have feelings for this guy I used to work with. I told him orignally that I liked another guy we worked with but it wasnt true. He told that I guy I liked him. I guess I was trying to hide my feelings and forcing myself to like someone else. In reality I like him and have feelings for him. He no longer works there and I miss him so much. Its been three weeks but it feels so much longer. Ive tried reaching out via text and social media to him but nothing.

I know I made a mistake and I know I probably hurt him. But the time we shared at work I knew he liked me back. He had to of. I just cant get over the idea that I did this to my self. I know i have issues and im working on being a better person. Ive been talking to psychics about it and I know thats not healthy. Belive me I know. I'm cutting my self off. I just wish he knew how I felt and I wish I knew if he felt the same.

Maybe this is fate? I dont know. Im tired of feeling unlovable and not feeling good enough. Im just so tired and exhausted. Im about to cry writing this. I feel a pain that i javent felt before. Its so hard not knowing. I feel helpless with this situation.

Im trying to be postive and keep going. I start school in 3 weeks to become a pharmacy tech. Im nervous but excited for the journey.

I know this is all crazy and I made a mistake. I live with it and I know I will have to move on and keep going.

My heart hurts but maybe it hurts for a reason?💘

If you read this whole post, thank you! I appreciate your time in seeing my problems.

I know everything gets better. Im praying things do🙏❤