I am such a horrible person!!!!!

I am the worst person. Ever!!! I got into with my dad keep in mind that we just lost my grandma on Christmas eve. Well my dad was here at my house he fell asleep for a good hour and some guy came for my dad my my boyfriend went to tell him that he was sleeping. So when my dad woke up he asked did anyone come for him. And my bf told him and he got all mad so my dad says if someone is here for me wake me up. So I told him that we didn't know so my dad starts yelling me and I start yelling back. I said some things I shouldn't have. But like my dad is 46 years old he don't have a job he relies on odd jobs, his two sisters that give him some moneys here and there, me and my boyfriend. My boyfriend and I barley make it by we struggle a lot. But my dad was super close to my grandma and he is taking it pretty hard. And I am such a horrible person for arguing with him and I should have just kept my mouth shut. I just feel so bad right now. I don't know what to do..