Safe at daycare. Anxiety vs reason for worry

Mommas I'm struggling to understand if my daycare concerns are valid or completely uncalled for and paranoid. I don't have a good gut sense because its clouded by my tendency to be anxious. My 16mo old has been at his current daycare since 7mo. Past 12mo they don't do daily sheets and are awful about communicating when he last ate, what he ate that day, if he pooped, what he did that day etc. Asking questions at pick up is like pulling teeth and you get 1 or 2 word closed replies. They don't send home progress reports like the EEC in MA is supposed to, nothing. So that's frustrating. He is on 1 nap now both at home and daycare but is always starving and miserable after his 4 daycare days and a great happy toddler at home 3 days a week. The difference in the evenings is incredible. I'm unsure if he's not getting the option of food or just too distracted to eat. His butt is also always red only on daycare days and his diaper region smells weird. Stale or what it's hard to pinpoint. If he didn't love going there and get excited to go and march off happily into the playroom when I dropped him off I'd suspect mistreatment of some kind. He seems to love both the lady and guy provider too, although the guy I find difficult to read and a little weird. They've been in business 15 years and no bad reviews I can find. I'm sure I'm crazy but wanted to hear from other daycare mommas if daycare days are this rough on other families. No I can't be a sahm sadly and switching daycares is an option but my hubby doesn't think my concerns are founded enough to act that drastically. Would just appreciate any feedback. TIA!