Babies, especially first time babies are known to come late. You don’t want them to buy tickets for the due date and miss out spending time with the baby. It’s probably safer for them to buy 3 weeks after birth anyway.

Apart from feelings, privacy and respects... You just physically needs time to recover to be comfortable with visitors, no matter how much they promise not to bring troubles, it's a lot of psychological pressure. My inlaws are really nice to me, but I learnt from my first pregnancy that I need to be alone or just with my mother. I told them to visit after 1-2 months after this delivery, they completely respect it. My boyfriend also changed his attitude completely after our first born. Encourage your husband to talk to someone with experience

You are 100% right when you say it's not about their feelings. This is their first grandchild, yes. More importantly this is your child. Your bonding, and comfort come before anyone's, in this situation. I have awful in law's, we made the when my second child was born that we wouldn't be seeing anyone for 2 weeks, so that we could navigate life as a family of 4, did they like it? No. Did I care? Nope. I recommend your husband reading the lemon clot essay, it may give him a better understanding of what you will be experiencing postpartum. I have navigated this world of completely overbearing (and abusive) in law's, if you ever need to vent, or talk about it, I'm here. Also check out justnomil on Reddit, some of these mils can be insane, but some are like yours. They are also an excellent place to go for advice. Hang in there, you are doing what's right for you, and your family.

Just another insight about the plane tickets... sometimes it saves money getting tickets in advance and last minute can cost a ton more. Also, you’ll be with the child all of the time and your in laws may only see this child maybe a couple of times a year unless they have a lot of money to spend on plane tickets. It is unreasonable to set out a time for them to come in advance. Since you’re not getting induced then you can tell them a week or two past the due date just in case. You’ll have plenty of bonding time in the hospital and at home during changings, feedings, ect.

Omg definitely do what you want and feel I felt exactly the same about having people over right away but I just told them all from the get go left it really transparent and said if you come in the first 3 weeks expect to see my tits out and me my hubby and the baby in bed lol!! We are resting and binding together as a family so if you come on that time I'm not getting dressed for you haha so I scared them all off and got the point across that it's our special bonding time and I'm not even entertaining people .. I think the more honest you can be even though it's hard, you can be honest and polite tho, the easier it is for everyone. They can then change their plans and tell you what they will do instead i.e buy a ticket and maybe miss the date, buy the ticket and stay down the road at a hotel or with someone else and just call in, or wait until you've had the baby and buy the ticket then for a few weeks time which sounds a better plan I'm sure your husband gets a weekend off or a day or so so he will still have plenty of time with them and the baby but you will never get your precious time back so make sure you fight your own corner and good luck keep up updated!! 🤞💓💓💓

I think I’ll have visitors at the hospital, but just his immediate family. Mine don’t live near at all and pretty sure aren’t making the journey to come out. Which is okay with me, I will see them about 2 months after we have her anyways. But once we go home I really don’t want visitors. He’s Hispanic and it’s the first grandchild for his family so it’s a huge deal for them. But I also don’t want my baby exposed to a bunch of germs and what not. Idk.

IDK to each their own...my parents live 2 hours away from me & as soon as baby girl is born (after her 1st week pediatrician check up) we are driving to my parents & staying for 2-3 weeks! FTM & I’m going to need my mom lol I think it’s more of a cultural thing for us Mexicans, family is always #1 && we have no boundaries when it comes to special events like new babies, I swear it’s going to be a party in the recovery room after baby is born 🙃🥰🥳

We have collectively told both sets of parents no visitors for a month. Mostly because I am stressing out at the idea of having 100 people in my house while I'm waiting for the baby to come and while we are trying to figure out what to do. Both sets of parents like to dictate and rule our lives and it drives me insane. They keep trying to push their own objectives, but we are standing strong on this one.

Same situation, as for you tho I would tell them the first 2 weeks we are having no visitors you need to establish a routine and get used to everything being a new parent. Tell them to buy a plane ticket for the first week in may and then can come visit then. Gives them time ahead to book and make it very clear you don't have the space to have them stay, and it will be a short visit. My MIL keeps saying how we wont be able to get her to leave our house ( same situation first grandchild on there side, and 1st baby for us. ) I told my husband that the first week I do not want visitors, we will be so tired and trying to adjust. Told him even in the hospital they aren't staying long. Ohh and you should make a rule that if anyone if coming over that they should text or call you before hand and not just show up. Keep in mind my inlaws live 10 minutes away! 🤦🏻‍♀️. It's your call with everything. Do what you want and feels right , not what others want. : )

You hold that ground I’m having a hard time with this as MIL lives 5min away 😑 husband thknks he should invite her over every other day once when I was coming out the shower there she was!!! I hate feeling like I have to entertain people especially when its right after work and I just want to ignore people for the night and watch my show while I can 😂