i cant even deal 😑

last night i asked my bf to take his foot off spooning me bc my back was hurting & i couldnt sleep & he made it dramatic & as if i pushed him away when i nicely said “babe put it ontop of my legs instead bc my back hurts” so this morning he woke up w an attitude & i asked if he was okay & what was wrong & he kept saying no & just simple as if something really was wrong . so somehow we ended up “arguing” bc he kept telling me to shiut up , shut the fuck up (& it pissed me off bc thats so rude to me & ive asked him before to stop shutting me up) i was just so mad my hands started trembling & i told him to be quiet & go take a shower (as he was going to already) bc i cpuldnt believe that i was getting yelled at for asking what was wrong & he somehow is saying i had something up my butt & that i woke up w the attitude & NOW im the immature one who needs to “grow up” bc i cant admit i was wrong ..... FOR WHAT EXACTLY?!?!?

i feel like this is just another gaslighting episode ive dealt w for a year & in all honesty i just want to pack & run away while hes at work & never speak to him again , would i be wrong?? (not running away bc of todays lil fight , but im menatlly tired of getting bashed for my feelings , nt being able to go out , etc)