My boyfriend and I have been ttc for 8 months now.. no luck. Every month it just gets harder to see a bfn, every month it gets harder to go through the motions, get through the 2ww, buy tests, take them.. holding my breath as the test works. And then ending in a sobbing mess because no second line ever shows up. My boyfriend tries his best to cheer me up. But what really, really hurts is when our families ask when were having a kid. When are we gonna give them a niece, nephew, grandchild, cousin etc. "You know you're getting old," "can you guys have a kid already?" "Get pregnant, I want to be a god mother." All of these things our families say. I cant blame them, I understand. There's nothing more i want than to have a child. Be a mother. Start a family. Give all these people their grandchild, niece, nephew.. I want to. And keeping the secret of ttc is slowly killing me because they always have a comment that literally breaks my heart. They dont know it but we are. We are trying. Sooo hard. Like, I'm sorry we are not succeeding at this.. I'm sorry to our families that we aren't having luck. It feels like we're letting them all down and they dont even know it. On the other hand, I want them all to be surprised if the day does come. It's such a frustrating feeling and sometimes I think I'm just being ridiculous.