My dad has been struggling with drinking really all his life. He grew up in a terrible situation, enough to drive anyone mad. Its only in recent years hes turned his life around. Hes got family, a job, no probation. I thought everything was good until last night. He told me last night for reasons I dont understand.. that occasionally he drinks. I was shocked when he told me this.

Anyone who knows my dad from then would tell you he was the meanest more aggressive alcoholic theyve ever met. Back then he had no limit. He could drink day and night. He was a mean drunk. No filter, no empathy, and no way of controlling his drinking. So to know hes "only drinking here and there" is incredibly concerning.

I really believed him when my dad said this was the time he would get clean and stay clean. But to know hes allowed himself to have a drink once in awhile when the urge gets to be too strong, hurts. Its not a controlled drink either.. not a "oh I feel like having a beer after a long day" type of drink... he told me its only when the urge gets so bad that he just has to have a little bit.

In my opinion hes no where near the amount of recovery he would need to truely be in control of an occasional "relaxing" drink. Honestly dont think he should drink ever again due to his history with it.

How can addiction be so ugly that it would literally convince you that just "once in awhile" is worth possibly losing it all? All hes worked for and he risks possibly going back to prison? Or not having his family anymore?

Truth is I dont know what to say or do anymore. He doesnt keep quiet enough to let me have a word in and texting him is hard because hes not the most literate person.. he struggles with reading and writing.

I guess I am asking if anyone knows what I should or should not say so that I can help him but also not trigger his past guilt to a point he has to have a drink. I really feel part of the reasons he continues to drink is to get over the horrible things of his past. Both done to him and the pain hes inflicted on those he loves.