I’m 34 and my husband and I went to our first fertility appointment today. Went well. Starting testing and such. On the way there I told my husband I was nervous bc we are admitting that something isn’t right and this could be the start of a very long journey. My mom went through menopause when she was 39. This has always been a cause for concern. She was also adopted and it took my parents 11 years, multiple MC’s, and a still born before having me. My husband is a very optimistic person and I normally am too but when it comes to this I don’t like to get my hopes up bc it’s crushing when month after month nothing happens. (We’ve been trying for about 9 months) He believes that I need to stay positive and have hope which part of me always does but I don’t vocalize it bc then I get my hopes up too much. Everyone always says “but it took so and so a year to get pregnant!” Or “it’ll happen, just stay positive” I get it, but hearing how long it took someone else just doesn’t help! I don’t know how to communicate with my husband how I’m feeling without the generic “stay positive” response or without him thinking I’m just being negative about it. I’m sure I’ll pick up the phone and start therapy again but I’m hoping someone here can give me some advice, someone who understands. Sorry it’s so long!