Hi lovelies. I'm not sure if this belongs in here but it's a relationship. Just, mine and my sisters.

To give background I've been ttc for around 8/9 months now. Tried opks, tried tracking, tried fertility gel, tried folic acid. No joy. Went for lap and dye, turns out I have a blocked tube and reduced fertility. Because we're so far down the line we're looking at having to go for fertility assistance.

****I found this out a week ago ****, so still fragile.

I can't hack pregnancy talk, posts, one of my partners friends is pregnant (which is fantastic) but I still sort of cry about it. Anyways. My sister, strangely seems to fall pregnant with ease, even on birth control (pill, patch, implant. You name it).

And I've just had to sit and hold her hand doing a pregnancy test because she seems incapable of using condoms alongside the birth control.

I'm mad. It feels unreasonable. But my world has totally stopped and everyone else's still goes on. Everyone's OK.

How do I deal with my irrational emotions?

I understand I probably sound like a terrible person but man my feelings are going wild.