Gaining weight & Low self-esteem

I feel like I’m just gaining weight instead of growing a bump, I hate it. I always been so concerned about my weight since I was just a little girl. Before I got pregnant I was kinda on the right track with my weigh then I gave up & started eating whatever I wanted. I blame myself, because I allow myself to eat what I want but if I’m hungry that means my baby is hungry so I’m gonna eat lol ugh has anyone felt like this? I eat frequently because if I don’t i get so nauseous it’s literally threw the roof!! To top it off, me & my boyfriend don’t ever have sex only twice since I got pregnant. He says it weird, now that I feel so much low self esteem it makes it worse cause he doesn’t make love to me.. 💔 I’m 12 weeks & 3 days