I wish it wasn’t bad to acknowledge when a “joke” is hurtful in a public setting because “you’ll make everyone uncomfortable” or “you’ll make a scene”. Generally, if someone gets upset at something said and this person responds “oh relax, I was only joking” chances are- they weren’t. They just don’t want to own up to the shitty thing they said or made fun of with that other person. Everyone has a history, words are hurtful, and they can damage someone for years to come.

When this person pokes fun at someone about something they have been made fun of for since they were little it’s not a joke, whether this person knew their history or not. It could’ve been something they’ve really been working on so that they won’t get made fun of anymore. It could be one of their deepest insecurities and making light of it just sets them so far back mentally that any progress that was made could’ve been shattered.

But since it’s socially unacceptable to stop and talk about how it made you feel and why it’s not a joke, they’ll never know. They’ll never get why you pick yourself apart in the mirror, or stop talking in class, and retreat into isolation. All you get is “buck up, shouldn’t let it affect you”, “ they were joking so don’t take it seriously”, “you need to be less sensitive”.