Mentally Abuse By Partner

How can you get yourself help with your partner mentally abusing you? Who can help in a situation like this ? Who to talk to ? Where to go ? I’m going crazy in my relationship he constantly accusing me of cheating and doing him wrong he constantly threatening me he will kill me if I’m really cheating on me and I’m to the point the abuse he do to me is making me go insane it make me not want to live life anymore i wanna leave but he won’t let me i have 4 children with him 12 years together i love him he can be a sweet heart but he have this demons that get to him and will torture me with his words I’m starting to believe I’m the problem I’m cheating I’m doing thing he said I’m doing that’s how Mess up he got me smh I’m scared on the out come if i do leave what he will do to me! I just need someone to vent to and tell me everything gone be okay i really hardy don’t have friends that will understand this situations and I’m embarrassed to tell anyone i rather come on here since you guys are stranger and might been in this situation smh i never think this situation will happened to me only think it will happened on lifetime movies please don’t judge me I’m always on my low and trying to be strong for my children God just isn’t hearing my prayers anymore smh i love him but idk what else to do