I’m convinced my newborn hates me.

I’m sitting here in tears because I haven’t had more than 2 hours sleep since she was born almost two weeks ago. I know everyone says this stage doesn’t last but it feels like it’s going to be this way forever.

My daughter settles down with everyone except me. I tried breastfeeding but haven’t been able to get her to latch correctly and she did so much damage to my nipples in the hospital that I’ve been pumping exclusively, and supplementing formula as my right boob doesn’t produce virtually any milk. And now I have mastitis in my left breast, which was the only one pumping anything worthwhile.

But because I have the stupid breasts with the stupid milk, my daughter gets anywhere near me and she immediately wants to feed. She refuses to sleep anywhere but in someone’s arms, but she’s the picture perfect baby for anyone else. Once she comes to me though, she fusses every 2-3 minutes for hours on end. She will not sleep, she just fusses and screams and she will not be consoled.

I’m exhausted and feeling so damn down that this perfect child cannot calm down around me.