I'm really sorry if my English isn't always correct, I'm Dutch, but I'm trying to do my best on English.

I am a 15 year old trans guy and I have been chatting with a 21 year old cis guy for a little while now, about basic, but also sexual things.

I know he's too old, but in case we will ever meet (may be when I'm old enough for it to be legal).

I'm a virgin and I don't know what I really want around sex. I'm sure that I want it, but because I'm transgender I'm really scared having bad gender dysphoria if he wants to go in my vagina.

I'm just so scared of it.

I tried to put something in myself, but I just can't. I can only put something in my anus and that feels really good, but in my vagina, it really hurts and it's so difficult to put something in.

He says that if I'm in the mood, it will fit, but I don't know if it will and if I will feel comfortable with it.

Can someone please help me?