I think i’m sucking myself into an eating disorder. When i was younger i was a gymnast til i was 18. I’m currently 19. I was constantly told for years i was fat. when i was younger i was forced to go to therapy for self harm. around this time i would binge then purge. my therapist told me that this wasn’t healthy and can lead to worse problems. i stopped and haven’t purged since. Now i’m 5’6” and currently 167 pounds. last month i was 180. i started eating right and running along side streets by my house to exercise. slowly i became obsessed. i log every calorie, even the tiniest crumb. then my best friend now ex best friend and his girlfriend started harassing me for days when i didn’t answer them. they made fun of my weight and he knew i was bulimic in the past. When this happened i wouldn’t eat. I started eating again and watched the scale go back up and all my hard work was gone. i started to skip an occasional meal. then i started sometimes going a whole day without food. I now only eat a few bites of dinner to make my parents stop being suspicious. now i’m currently realizing this isn’t healthy but i cant stop. this brings me satisfaction. how could i go from eating food all the time even if i wasn’t hungry to not being able to eat. I’m currently taking methylphenidate for my ADHD (prescribed). it suppresses my appetite of course but i get hungry. i know i do. i just can’t eat. i will see results and keep wanting to eat less. i know eating right and healthy won’t make me gain weight but i cant stop starving myself. i’m currently sitting in my bed crying wondering whats wrong with me. do i have an eating disorder? please keep the comments nice. i come here seeking advice because i know there is a problem with myself. i apologize if this was all over the place.