I found out about a week ago that I’m pregnant. I’m 6 weeks and 2 days along right now. However, I’m 19 and this was my (and my partner’s, 20M) first kick in the face as to being an adult. After talking through it, we mutually decided it wouldn’t be best to bring a child into this world while we’re both so young and unprepared (unprepared is an understatement). I’m going later this week/early next week to a doctor who can help me see what my options are for terminating.

Now, I’ve never been the type to want kids (in fact, I said I’d rather not have any), but this situation is tearing me apart. I feel like after finding out about the pregnancy, it just changed my whole perspective on having children, and it made me realize I do want to. I’ve got some medical problems that severely affect my reproductive system, and doctors have told me that I have an extremely low risk of being fertile, let alone my uterus being safe enough to house the baby. It scares me to think that this could be my only chance at having a kid with the man I love. I know the baby hasn’t developed much, and even though I know we’re terminating, I’ve been taking care of myself like I have something (well, someone in this case) to lose. I keep thinking about what we could’ve named him/her, how we would raise them, etc... I know him and I are making the right decision as to what to do, but I just feel so horrible about all of it...

I just need something to try and help me feel better about all of this 😞