I don’t know what to believe...

UPDATE: As awful as this sounds, he ended up cheating 2 more times on me. So since this was the first time it happened he wanted to cover his ass up. We dated for 3 years and ended on good terms last december. not even 9 months later, he has a brand new girlfriend..... Fuck him :)

On this past Saturday me and my boyfriend were hanging out at at his dorm for a little bit. We were perfectly fine, we were enjoying each others company and laughing and being how we usually are. I was helping him get ready because he was going out for his friends 21st, around 730 i left because i told my parents i would go out to eat with them. When he got to the party he said there was jell-o shots and he was drinking beer too, around 845 he was pretty drunk and texting me he loved me and how he’s lucky to have me. from then on i hadn’t heard a single word from him no snapchat stories and no texts. So i check his location and was worried because i knew he wasn’t at his dorm. around 330am i get a text saying he was at his friends dorm and he fell asleep and so i said okay go home get some rest, he had work the next day.

The next day comes and we were normal. Around 150 i get a FaceTime from him and he was hysterically crying, he was sobbing crying and i kept asking what was wrong because i thought something terrible had happened with his family. He blurts it out and i heard “I was taken advantage of last night. I don’t remember anything, i woke up in ___ bed and she was naked and i got so freaked out i left and told you i was at my friends because i didn’t know what to do.” and i didn’t know what do to, i kinda thought it was a joke at first and was like haha okay, we’ve been together for 3 years you wouldn’t really do that? And he would not stop apologizing and sobbing and saying how sorry he is. I want to believe him so bad that he doesn’t remember. Every time i ask him to tell the story it’s all the same details nothing new and story never changed. He cried to his friends and they said they saw this girl pull him out of the party, and they were thinking she was gonna bring him home to his dorm or something because he was blacked out drunk for a while. They all know we dated because I was at his dorm earlier and and talked to all of them. He said he doesn’t remember leaving the party, walking home, or ever seeing her. He told me at one point he came to and realized she was on top of him. And doesn’t remember anything after that.

To be completely honest, i know him better than anyone i know. And i know he would NEVER soberly hu with someone else considering he tells me he’s gonna marry me and we’re gonna have babies and grow old together. This whole situation just sucks and i have no idea what to believe. it’s just harder to forgive when you don’t know the full story. Right now we are friends and working on ourselves to hopefully build a stronger relationship in the future.