Who wants to hear about my Crap Carnival of a morning?!

It all started last night, when I introduced Cecilia (my 10 month old daughter) to whipped cream. She loved it. Remember that.

This morning, I made some bacon and you know how that goes. It’s great, but smells up the whole house, so we don’t make bacon often. I made breakfast, got Cece down for a nap, cleaned the kitchen, opened all the windows to air out the bacon smell (remember that too), and then she was up from her nap before I got the chance to shower. No biggie, I’ll just bring her in the shower with me. Done it since she was tiny and she loves it. I lay all of her stuff out on my bed, and get the shower ready. I strip Cece down to her diaper on the bed, we go in the bathroom (I close the door. We TRY to be private people 🤦🏼‍♀️), I strip down, and grab Cece to take off her diaper and a GIANT TURD goes flying across the bathroom when I take her diaper off! She still had poop stuck to her butt, I scream (which freaked her out and she started crying), I lay my precious poop covered crying daughter on the bathroom floor 🤢 and RUN from my bedroom to hers (past THREE OPEN WINDOWS. BUTT. NAKED.) for the wipes, praying she doesn’t roll around or grab any poop, and praying nobody sees my naked panicked self bookin’ it through the windows. I make it back the the bathroom, wipes in hand, I clean her up enough for the shower, stick her in, clean up the flung poop, and hop in with her. At this point I feel like I can breath again. We’re in the clear.

I scrub her down, and then I move on to myself. I decided I wanted to wear shorts today, as we are expecting 73* weather. So

I decided to shave. Cece is happily playing with her toys, so I knew I had the time. Except as soon as my creamy white shaving cream rinsed off my razor onto the shower floor, Cece STARTED EATING IT because she thought it was whipped cream. It was not whipped cream, and she made a face, only to try another bite. I yell “Cece it’s not whipped cream!” And rinse her hands, and she mad at me for taking away her treat 🙄

We finally made it out of the shower. Both traumatized, but at least clean. I managed to shave both my legs with minimal shaving cream ingested by LO.

Let me tell you, mom life is much more exciting than I anticipated. It’s a good thing she’s cute. #MomLife