And just like that my baby is gone 💔

Today started off good. I had the day off, woke up happy with my family. Went out to lunch with extended family and it was great.

Late afternoon I had a routine doctors appointment. My doctor tried to listen for the heartbeat but couldn’t find it. So she sent me over to radiology to have an ultrasound done. An hour later I finally got into the ultrasound room and after a few minutes the tech decided she needed “another pair of eyes” and grabbed another tech. I immediately knew that wasn’t good.

After the ultrasound they didn’t tell me ANYTHING, they just sent me over to the family life center. I knew right there I had lost the baby. I was 18 weeks. I’m in disbelief and completely in awe that this has happened. This baby was suppose to be my rainbow. And now it’s lost like the baby before. It breaks my heart that I have to tell my entire family and everyone at work now. And my 3 year old daughter doesn’t understand at all what’s going on. She just knows I’m sad.

I don’t think i ever wanna get pregnant again. This pain is too much to bare.