Just wanting to vent since I don’t really have anyone one...

Hello I’m just going to vent here because I really don’t have anyone and I’m just feeling so hurt, lost and hopeless. So let me just start off by saying that my mom and I never had a great relationship. She’s one of those moms that try act more like a friend then an actual mom. And my father left the picture when I was only 3 (he just passed away to suicide). Well let’s just say that I went looking in the wrong places for this love to fill the void. And well now I am a mother of an amazing two year old girl and I’m pregnant with my second. Things where going great for a while. My daughters father proposed to me and we were expecting our second. And then things just went terrible. I found out he was seeing an ex girlfriend whom they share a child with. I wasn’t too fond of her as she openly called herself a hoe and started seeing a married guy. So yeah I really didn’t want him seeing her. I was fine if his kid came over and so we both agreed to keep it that way. But then out of nowhere he would constantly go to another room or outside to answer texts and calls. Turns out he was basically trying to get back with her. So I of course moved out and I don’t have much family around me other that my mother and grandmother. So I went to my grandmothers. She hasn’t been the same since she got brain cancer and she’s done with all her chemo but she never went back to her old self 😔 today she started yelling at me because my daughter was being too noisy and went out of topic and started saying how my mom should’ve listened to her and had that abortion. Right now I just decided to lock ourselves in the room and I have no idea what to do. I can’t be working rn cause I’m supposed to be on bed rest due to some bleeding during this pregnancy. I literally don’t want to be here anymore but I have no where to go and I’m honestly so sad that I cry every single day. I wish things weren’t the way they are.