Hi everyone.

This is a horribly sad situation so please keep any rude comments to yourself. Trigger warning.

I’m going to give some background before getting into the serious part.

My boyfriend (we will call him John) and I have known each other for forever. Growing up I was best friends with his sister and this was before he was even born. I’ve literally known him his entire life. He’s had a difficult life and both of his parents have passed away. His mom was addicted to pills and I believe she passed those addictive traits onto him. When John drinks or goes off of his medication he turns into a completely different person.

I left for a almost-month long solo vacation to another country. It was great. John and I spoke daily and everything seemed fine. I had my insecurities but what women doesn’t? When I got back home and everything seemed okay. But when we woke up the next day, he broke up with me claiming he “saw me as a sister.” It broke my heart but we have always been great friends and decided to stay that. Later that night, we got in a fight because I woke him up. He was still staying at my place until he found somewhere else to go. He punched me in the face that night and I left to go stay at a friends house. When I got home the next morning he had no idea that I had left in the middle of the night or any of the events from the night before.

Now... Before I go any further I want to mention this because it’s an important detail. He has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. At this time I was unaware that he had not been taking his meds. Add in alcohol and some anti-anxiety medication that I didn’t know he had taken and there’s a recipe for disaster.

After talking about the night before, we went about or normal day. Later that we got into a small fight but got over it quickly and decided to go out for some drinks. I didn’t know he had taken anti-anxiety medication. We shared a mixed drink and a beer. Then, out of nowhere, he got PISSED and stormed out of the bar. We live close by, so I followed him home. He preceded to tell me how I had never done anything for him and was constantly mean to him. I should have known something was off because his eyes and face were just... Blank. But then he punched me in the nose and got on top of me, holding me down. He preceded to spit in my face and yell at me. He hit me in the jaw. I was able to scramble up and tried to get my phone to call the police but it wasn’t working. This just made him more angry. Eventually I was able to grab my phone and run to the building next door to call the police. It felt like they took forever to arrive but it was actually only 3 minutes. However, in that three minutes, he killed my dog. He stabbed him. Twice. While he was sleeping. My dog was my baby. My absolute world.

Now, I am not justifying ANYTHING that he did. But I will say that people who are bipolar already do insane things when they are off their medication. Add in alcohol and other pills...

He’s turning his life around. He’s seeing a psychiatrist and is in treatment. He’s found God again and is attending church. He claims to not remember much of that night and asked if I would be willing to do counseling with him.

What do I do ladies? Forgive him? Forget him?