So this is a story about when I first decided I wanted to become a mom at 16. It never happened, and I’m 24 now and expecting my first baby with my loving boyfriend.

The reason I’m telling this story is I lost friends over this.

I ended up dating a guy around 15 years old. He was an awful guy. He mistreated me emotionally and sometimes physically too. At 15-17 years old. On and off.

A teenager shouldn’t have to go through those kind of traumas. My “friends” didn’t understand I was still growing up, and that I was naive. Instead of helping me, supporting me, and trying to get me to understand in a more better way, they shut me out every time I went back to him. This guy put in my head that I wanted to get pregnant. That he loved me, and cared about me. There was cheating, and abandonment every time he got sex from me. We never used protection. If we got back together and I said we would have sex, and I decided I didn’t when we met up, he left and I wouldn’t hear from him.

The worst part is, he raped me. While he was my boyfriend and it was during school hours.

It pains me that I lost friends over something that I wish I could’ve gotten support on. After my friends left they kept spreading rumors that I was pregnant. Even their mom got involved. She would ride passed me and ask how many months are you. Not a big deal when you’re an adult, but I was a teenager.

I found out this friend ended up having a daughter before we left high school.

Teenagers do go through some rough shit. I wish I had better friends. Even though I was so naive, I still dreamed of becoming a mother as my main goal in life. Even at 16, even with the abuse. I’m happy to say though, my goal is finally going to be met in November!