The heartache.

Turning 30 soon and we’ve been trying for years. I feel like once I hit the big 3-0, my chance will be slim to nothing. Five days until AF should arrive and I know she will. My heart can’t take another negative test. After AF. All we’ve been praying for is our miracle baby. Everyday someone is announcing their pregnancy or giving birth. Just once I wish it was me. I’ve gone to the doctors. Had tests ran. I just give up. Throwing in my towel. No pregnancy announcement for me. No gender revel. No baby shower. No giving birth. Here’s to turning the big 3-0. Depressed as ever.