I think my relationship is over

So my bf cheated on me when I was 3 months pregnant. I’m now almost 6 months. Even had sex with her... we live together and he would make up excuses to go out and would fuck her. Even met her kids! I forgave but didn’t forget, I mean I really wanted to spend my life with him. Things have been good and he’s been trying to redeem himself. tbh just these past few days my hormones have me bawling my eyes out about this, I can’t forget, I can’t stop imagining him with her, having sex with her. These last few days (although I do still have mad love for him) I’ve just realized that I can’t live with the worry of what if it happens again? I just can’t bring myself to be happy about starting a family with someone who might throw it all away again. Just feeling really down and I know it will get better and I will find a man who truly appreciates me one day but tbh right now reality is hitting me hard and it hurts a bit. I thought I could get over this but I really can’t- it is breaking my heart everyday worrying if he’s talking to her or someone else. Even his family resents him for cheating (they LOVED me). But it is what it is and it’s honestly time I stop worrying about a man being unfaithful. 😔 I should’ve left in the beginning but I wanted to believe we could make this last forever. Not even him trying to make it up to me or trying to make it right has worked, just woke up today and finally realized I won’t ever get over it and I can’t live my life wondering if I’m being made to look a fool all over again 🤷🏻‍♀️😔 if you read all of this then thank you for reading. I just needed to put my thoughts down besides in my head. If you comment I will see it and will appreciate it but I will not be responding so I can stay anonymous because I’m honestly ashamed I ever even stayed with a cheater, someone who clearly never had half the love I had for him.

Edit: to the people who have commented so far and who will comment thank you so much! I’m too embarrassed to respond and have my profile shown but please know I appreciate all of your kind words! It makes me know and feel in my heart that what I’m feeling is not wrong and that I can do this and it will be ok! 🥰♥️ thank you so so much! I really do appreciate every single comment ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️