Would you move?

Question

My SO snapchatted over 30 different girls in the beginning stages of our relationship. I forgave him, but it was all girls in his home town. We are now expecting and he wants to move back to be around family, but I’m not comfortable being in a small town around all the girls he cheated on me with, and he said I’m selfish for not moving. What would you do? Am I crazy? Or would you feel the same way?

Answer

You’re not selfish you’re just kind of....... not smart. Why stay with someone who has cheated on you that many times?!

Answer

You are not crazy to feel that way. I wouldn't want to either. You will have that constant fear of him reconnecting.

Answer

First off, he is not the one who is growing a human inside of them. He is not the one to push said human out of their body. He is not the one who will be breast feeding. And he is not the one who has a all these hormones running around in their body. That would be you. So as to you moving? Well why do you need to move? Is he planing on being a stay at home dad and wants to use his parents for a support network? If not, then why would you uproot your life from your already established network and support system. I mean if the move, is for you to have a better support system  then I am pretty sure that you are qualified to say where you, as the one who is actually having to go through the pregnancy, will feel the most relaxed and supported. 
Clearly, that is not going to be where he cheated on you. The fact that he is twisting this on you to make you doubt yourself and call you selfish is concerning. 
I mean if he really wants to move, why not closer to your parents? Why his? 
He needs to understand that as the partner he needs to be in a supporting role. That means trying to make you feel the most relaxed and happy as possible. Which means you live where the lady who is carrying the baby says she feels the most comfortable. And untill you can get pregnant, you can sit down and shut the hell up.

Answer

Nope he needs to respect your feelings now since he obviously didn't care about them when he was talking to other women. He lost this battle when he did that.

Answer

You’re not crazy or selfish I can’t blame you for not wanting to move to a small town with all his ex’s. Is there somewhere else you can move that still is close to his family?

Answer

If you stayed with him and forgave him then it shouldn’t be a big deal. You’re having his baby. He has a right to be close to his family and friends. If you still don’t trust him I would talk to a therapist to see if staying in this relationship is worth it. I’m not saying you have to forget what happened but not moving somewhere is a little ridiculous. 30 women is a lot and depending how long you’ve been together I’m sure those women don’t even care enough about him to make the move a big deal. He has a right to live where he wants. He screwed up and what he did was not ok but when you stayed with him you chose to move on. Talk to a therapist they can help you both out because to me it doesn’t seem like you trust him- and if not that’s ok you either need to learn to trust or move on from him but either way something needs to be done

Answer

So what you’re saying is that you still don’t trust him? I think that’s an important question to ask yourself… Along with why are you with him if you don’t trust him? Why are you building a life with someone you don’t trust? Now don’t get me wrong, I think if you move, you both need to be on the same page, but I think it’s kind of shitty to base that decision on the fact that you don’t trust your man.

Answer

No, it’s not just you, would feel extremely uncomfortable moving there knowing there is so many women he cheated with. You should explain to him that he could be considered selfish because he wants you to go out of your comfort zone to the point you feel threatened in your relationship due to other females.

Would you move?

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