I know it’s selfish I know I shouldn’t think that way or feel the way I do I shouldn’t put my son through it or my husband but I want to die everything is starting to go right I have a job my 3 month old son and my husband but I still feel alone and want to die I’ve depressed for years I did some fucked up shit to my body attempted suicide but I’m back to that point and I don’t know what to do I can’t afford a therapist or pills to make me better I hate myself more and more each day the past of what I can’t change my future of what I can’t control and when I make mistakes or how nervous I stay with anything and everything and how sick I actually am