LONG POST I just want to know, am I overreacting..?

Question

Ladies, I'm sure I'm just overreacting but I want opinions.. My sister in law is planning my baby shower for next weekend and so far it's been nice having her do this for us, but when she was creating the event on Facebook to invite people she asked me "who do you want to go?" I told her to invite their family obviously and I would go in and invite my family and OUR friends. Well me and my boyfriend agreed not to invite one specific person my boyfriend used to be friends with along with his sister (we have had issues with him and she knows why we dont want him there.) Well when we told her we would like him not to be invited she said "Well I'll let him (my boyfriend) decided if he wants him to come or not. He will buy you presents if you invite him.) I told her we had already talked about it and he didnt want him to go either, and that him buying us stuff wont change our minds, so she waited a few days then invited him.. I saw that she invited him and decided not to make a big deal, so me and my boyfriend just agreed that if he goes we will just ignore our issues with him and have fun. Well I start going through the list again of people she has invited so far and I see that she has started inviting all of HER friends.. okay..? I talk to my boyfriend and he says he didnt know she was going to do that and was a little annoyed by it.. the friends she has invited of her own I have never met or ever heard of, same with her brother, he has never met or heard of them.. should I say something? Am I overreacting? I really dont want to make a big deal over it because I am really happy she decided to do this for us, but we don't even know these people. My boyfriend isnt sure what to say to her either 😕🤷‍♀️

Answer

She may just be thinking, “the more you invite, the more you get.” So she might feel she’s helping lessen the burden of buying a bunch of newborn things.
However, if I was in this situation, I’d be mad because I don’t NEED to be given anything. This is supposed to be a very intimate moment, celebrating a new life you’ve created! I wouldn’t want people there who aren’t going to ACTUALLY be a part of my child’s life.
The more is not always the merrier!

Answer

My sister in law is notorious for this ! She likes to plan things for others. BUT she never listens to what me and my husband want to do, who to invite, etc. In the end it has to be done either her way or the highway. So we cancelled the planning with her, and just doing it ourselves. We appreciate her efforts, but in the end we want to be happy and enjoy ourselves.

Answer

My sister in law is helping me with my baby shower. At first, I thought it was going to be great. However she isn’t really listening to what I want. I told her I want a simple fall nature them. Like super simple. So simple I was literally just going to go out into my backyard in September and get the decor. I have these beautiful green jars I just want to put those leaves and things in... I don’t want to put too much effort into it. 
Well she is already making vases with fabric on them and fake flowers in them. I keep saying “no I just mean I want to literally just stick a flower into the jar and boom done.”  But she doesn’t seem to understand what I want. 
I have a plan for the prizes and she wants to add random things she has at her house. I really don’t want to come off mean or ungrateful but my vision is this all out. I feel like every time someone else plans something for me it never comes out to what I really wanted.  I am just frustrated and I’m more involved then I thought I would be. 
So I understand where you are coming from. I would just tell her straight up you don’t think inviting her friends is appropriate. Especially without asking. This is a celebration for family. Not with people you don’t know and probably don’t know you.

Answer

This is crazy! I would try to make your desires perfectly clear and see how she responds. If you've already been clear with her, I would cancel the whole thing and organize it yourself.

LONG POST I just want to know, am I overreacting..?

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