My and my OH are mid-argument at the moment over my side of the family.

My mums had to disclose that my younger brother (who has autism and learning difficulties) engaged in some inappropriate behaviour with a girl a couple of years younger than him. My mom tries hard to educate him on what is and isn’t appropriate and rightly so after finding out about this incident it’s been reported and is being handled by the social services to try and raise the point he still needs education. I don’t view it as a horrific incident but pulling forwards looking down a younger girls top obviously constitutes inappropriate behaviour. There have been incidents previously where he’s shared images of himself but the girl in question was online and told him she was a few years older than she was.

With that bit of context in mind, me and my OH have an open book policy when I comes to sharing and I told him. Now he’s gone mental saying my mums not to have our baby girl (due November) at her house. We’re also planning to marry abroad and he’s said my brother isn’t coming and that’s the end of it and if he does we have got to disclose to all our friends / his family what’s happened because he’s a ‘risk’.

I’m not the best of friends with my brother to begin with, and whilst I don’t condone his misjudgments and understanding I do understand that he needs more than a ‘pedo’ label. But my OH doesn’t see it this way at all and basically wants me cut contact and stop my mom having our daughter once she’s here.

I don’t know what to do, I’m under an immense amount of stress as I’m having a hard time with my pregnancy and the amount of pain I’m in. We’re severely understaffed at work so I’m trying to manage 2 workloads. I’ve got worries for other family members in I’ll health. I secretly referred myself for counselling a couple of weeks ago (waiting for an appointment) because I know im struggling more than I can cope with but because my OH has no capacity to understand mental health I’m now worrying he’ll turn this against me when it comes to caring for our baby. He already said he wants me to join as many mom/baby groups as I can whilst I’m on maternity because I’ll go ‘weird’ stuck in the house all the time.

All of the above aside - he’s actually been a fantastic support whilst I’ve been pregnant. He’s kept on top of everything for me I just he could just be as present emotionally as he is physically 😕 I feel so down right now.

I’m not sure what my point in this was but thank you for reading. Im glad to share it somewhere because I don’t feel like I can talk to anyone in my life right now.