I lived in the dorms where I became good friends w the guys across from my room, who I thought I could trust. (3 of them, 1 my roommate dates) One night I went to hang n they started pushing me to drink- a mixed drink he insisted to make- I’m “1 of the guys” so this was reg, I got weird vibes but I trusted em. After drinking for a while I got tired, my girl friend left n apparently her bf said oh haha she’s staying w “the guy” - I had no intentions to n this was 1hr b4 “it”, meaning they talked n planned b4- I remember laying down n VERY brief painful parts of having sex I was so incoherent I only remember enough to kinda know I had sex, I had alcohol poisoning n was so blacked out I threw up w/o even knowing or waking up! (He was nottt very drunk at all n just left me there knowing I could’ve choked) I felt so embarrassed but they’re“friends” so I disregarded it, it didn’t bother me much, my friends just regarded it as a spiral experience w a hot FB player but I’m starting to feel a way ab it. I don’t wanna say I was raped, idk, I didn’t wanna, don’t remember saying yes, n was hella drunk but this was a good while ago n I live somewhere else now. Now I can’t get myself to trust this other guy I’m “talking” to, Ik he wants to hook up n I think I do too but I’m scared even though I trust him what should I do?! -Tell him b4 so he understands...seems too personal? -Don’t do it? -Just go for it n trust? All advice helps, my friends aren’t very trustful obvs n I don’t wanna tell my sisters/ family! I don’t want him to lose interest in me by waiting for me to follow through but I can’t help but be hesitant! Thx!

UPDATE: Got rid of the guy and scheduled counseling for myself, as much as I like him he should like me enough to wait until I want to. Thank you so much for the comments, it really did help me realize my feelings as well as validate them, everyone kind of brushed me off and it made me feel like I was crazy or making a big deal so you’re all very appreciated!❤️❤️❤️