a couple weeks ago, I reconnected with a somewhat old friend. we met my sophomore year (I'm a senior in hs now), and were briefly friends.

as I said, a couple weeks ago, we reconnected, and have been pretty good friends, growing closer at that.

the first few days we talked, my best friend immediately pointed out "I love that's how stoners ask each other out", as he said "hey you're pretty chill, we should smoke sometime?", and continued to ask to hang out either in person or on an online game

I dont have feelings for him yet, I mean I've got graduation this year as a priority and my work, as I stream on Twitch, and it's a constant grind in order to establish a nice community

I want to give him a chance, but I dont know how to acknowledge my fears and embrace them, maybe even talk to him about them.

he's a great guy, and we're still only getting to know each other as friends, but it's also obvious that something more could (and seemingly will) happen

yesterday we were talking about how he was rewatching the entire Stranger Things show, and I said I had thought about doing that after my summer school advancement classes ended. he said he'd be down to watch it a third time, so I shot my shot and asked if he wanted to hang out and have a little marathon together, and he said yes!!

he supports my streaming, which means a lot to me, and we have a lot in common and can feel pretty comfortable talking about what we dont have in common

at times I still feel a bit awkward, and for a majority I still feel the fear that he only wants to be friends, even though literally ALL my friends say we have mutual feelings.

I know I just need to get to know him better to the point where I feel comfortable enough to address these fears with him, or to trump them with better ones.

but what do I do with them in the meantime? I dont want them to take over and make me end up self-sabotaging myself. I dont want to lose him as a friend, no matter if we get into something or not.

update:

yesterday I hung out with him and a friend of ours and the crush literally told us about how he's been hanging out with this girl (who is 17 and has 3 kids) and that if he gets drunk at her house again something is bound to happen.

basically I deserve better and I cut him off