The second time!

So this is my second time going through this, we was actually trying this go round! I thought I did everything right I guess it just wasn’t meant to be... it’s like a slap in the face and I said I wasn’t going to get my hopes up and I low key did anyway! The first time I found out it was a ectopic pregnancy it was in November, my hCG levels was declining, just found out yesterday(July) that it’s happened again and my hCG level was rising this time... So I have to go get “the shots” Methotrexate again... I thought I was dying last time so I’ve prayed on it... I’ve tried not to question God, but in the back of my mind I’m like why me again? And I feel like I’m going through this alone and the one person I thought would be there for me is MIA! I just feel bad all the way around!!! So i feel like it’s me something is wrong with me... I really wanted this baby... we’ve tried so hard, I think I’m done actually trying, I don’t want to keep going through this!!!