5 pieces of masturbation advice I wish I could give my younger self...

1) It is nothing to be ashamed of, loving self-pleasure does not make you a slut or a bad person.

2) The cashier does not give two fucks if you're buying lube and sex toys. They have scanned weirder stuff.

3) A little lube goes a long way, don't use half the bottle.

4) No, you cannot fit a size:large toy in your body, do not buy any toy in large until you are SURE you can take it. Those things are expensive damnit and your body won't thank you for trying to force it.

5) For the love of God, stop losing your bullet vibes in your backpacks, it kills the mood to have to go searching for them.