Let me start off with, I had a miscarriage about 2 months ago now. After my miscarriage, I became depressed in a way that I wasn’t taking care of our home and also myself (meaning I was over eating, badly). I carry my weight well but I’m aware than I’m now over weight. While the house was not clean and frankly neither was I, my husband began to lay it on me. Telling me I was disgusting and nasty and he doesn’t know who raised me but it’s gross.. and a lot more. It was..... hurtful to say the least. A man who has never spoken to me this way, is now putting me down in my hardest time. Anyhow, after that I decided to not let the house or myself get gross again. So I’ve kept the house spotless and myself upkept... but now I’m having a problem with food. I want to eat so badly, but I can’t. Im not hungry and what I do eat, is not a lot. On my fitness pal I have it set to put my calories so that I lose 2 pounds a week... and I’m under eating by at least 700 calories per day. I’ve dropped 11 pounds in 2 weeks. I do not want to think that I have a eating disorder because I genuinely want to eat, but I can only eat too much before I feel full. I don’t even know what the point of this was. I guess I just need to rant. I feel like somethings wrong. Idk. We’re ttc now again, and I just feel like I’m not nourishing my body enough for another baby. ☹️☹️☹️

(With the under eating calories thing I’m suppose to eat 1,500 a day to lose weight set at 2 pounds a week, but I’m usually under eating that 1,500 by 600 or 700 calories a day- if that makes sense)