I feel like something is seriously wrong with me.

I search for self harm topics, I google self harm, I search for self harm everywhere. And I know that might be normal when struggling with self harm, but it’s the reason why I do it.

I used to self harm. A LOT. And for a very long time. I’ve been clean for 8 months now, and I am COVERED in scars. And they’re really bad.

What I’m trying to say is, I search for pictures of self harm, to feel better about my own scars. I know this is really wrong. Because almost every photo I find, the person has less and/or more “surfacy” scars than I do, so I compare my own scars to other people’s scars, when I’ve looked at my scars for so long that I eventually feel like their not very serious. So when I see scars that are, please don’t misunderstand me, “less” than mine, I feel better about mine.

WTF IS WRONG WITH ME?!! I feel so fucking bad about it!