Hello Girls,

God bless you!

Since I was like 11 years old I started masturbation and watching porn (I knew very little about God), then I continued growing up (obviously 😂🤦‍♀️) and so my porn and masturbation addition. Actually, I met the Lord when I was 14-15 years old, but only visited church, but didn’t had a Christian lifestyle and neither knew about it, because that church didn’t even offered me Baptism preparation (I’m 24 now, and now I’m getting ready to do it in another church). When I was 17 I was at the university and used to touch myself in the bathroom multiple times and almost did it every single day at home before and after classes, and got away from God because some difficult things that I didn’t knew how to manage... But, the thing is that when a boy talked to me about sex I just didn’t accepted like I felt it was not Ok, but never knew why... I’m 24 years old and never kissed a guy (When I was 13-14 two guys at the same time and at 16 another guy tried to violate me and kissed me, but I think this not count) and still virgin by choice, a choice that I was always wondering if was wrong or not (until now that I’m really learning about God and his plans) and always tried to figure out if something was wrong with me (I even talked with a psychologist about that).

My question is (sorry for all the history ), What can I do with temptation? A year ago (almost two years really), by God grace, I decided not to watch porn anymore and was when I started to look for God again and study his word seriously, and it was incredibly easy (I looked for comics like two times very apart in the first year) and I don’t feel tempting about watching it anymore... but, when it comes to masturbation is way too hard for me, I have almost two months without doing it but I’m feeling the urge and I don’t know what to do because when I feel like that I get very flirtatious and can’t control myself (I even walk different, and doesn’t matter what clothes I use My walk is like way too “attractive” and where I live man can’t not keep their mouths closed about it) and that’s the excuse I was to touch myself again, but I don’t want to do it anymore. And also My mood changes and I just can’t be as happy as always when I’m feeling that way, sometimes I just want to cry...

I really don’t have a friend with witch I can talk about it, and almost no body knows about the almost-violations things...

Please, tell me what to do... I really want to give myself as a sacrifice to God and wait to see if there is a christian man (real Christian man) in God’s plans for me. But is hard, it’s 4 am in the morning and I can’t sleep because of this, and church starts at 9 am.... :(