Does it always turn physical?

Question

I am in a very emotionally abusive relationship with my daughter's father. We have been together for 3 years and my baby is 6 months old. I'm having a very hard time leaving. It gets better, then bad, better, then worse.
I just have to know... does it always start off with emotional abuse or is it usually physical from the beginning?

Answer

Honestly, does it matter? Does he have to hit you to make you leave? 
Not being rude, just being honest. 
Plenty of people are emotionally abused for years and years, and it never escalates to physical violence. That doesn’t mean it isn’t as horrible and damaging. 
Think of yourself. Think of your daughter. Get out and get better. 
If you’re afraid of him being physical, Leave in a “smart” way. Not during a fight or argument. Call the police and say you’re moving out and pack a bag for you and your child and walk out. Preferably while he’s at work, so you have a few hours. Have a plan to go to a trusted family member or friend. Don’t worry about physical possessions, they can be replaced. The safety and security of you and your child is priceless. 
If you need to, file a protective order. Don’t respond if he becomes threatening. Document it and ignore him. 
You are strong enough. You are worthy enough. You are enough for yourself. For your daughter you are EVERYTHING.

Answer

It usually starts with emotional abuse. Get out mama, you have to get out before he hurts you or your baby.

Answer

Usually physical abuse starts after emotional abuse, often there will be no physical abuse for a very long time, until the abusers knows pretty well they can get away with physical abuse & you won't leave.
Abuse tends to get worse and worse over time. And it definitely cycles just like you described, because if it was always bad, of course you'd have left!!! But sometimes, the abuser behaves, even treats you fucking amazing. It's part of being manipulated, unfortunately. If the abuser senses you've had about enough and will leave, they'll reel you right back in with love bombing, being a good partner, etc. 
I don't know if emotional abuse always turns physical, but emotional abuse is no joke, it changes you, it changes who you are and how you think. Even after you leave, you'll be feeling what your abuser would want you to do. 
I, of course, think you need to leave, for you, for your kid- who will learn seeing that behavior & your relationship. Of course it's hard, leaving my abuser was the hardest thing I've ever done, you really have to be strong, I've never felt so misunderstood and so alone and so alienated from who I used to be, but you rebuild your life, and honestly it's wonderful not to be controlled, not to worry what mood your partner will be in, if they will let you sleep, if they will yell at you for going to the store without them, etc. (Mine would keep me up interrogating me & calling me a slut and all sorts of weord stuff. I would literally break into a sweat on my way home from work thinking I'd see him soon. Shit is very bad when you are scared of your boyfriend.)
I know other people don't understand why it's hard to leave, I'm just saying, you'll be ok, you'll have a new life! You'll grow in ways you can't fathom as a person!

Answer

Agreeing with some of the voyager comments! Just because it’s not physical doesn’t mean you should stay! Don’t put yourself through that you deserve better. I know it’s not quite the same but my mother was emotionally abusive my whole life and it was awful. Counted down the days until I couldn’t get out but back then I didn’t have a choice - you do! You got this. Don’t even think about anyone but yourself rn ❤️

Answer

I was in a solely emotional abusive relationship for 2 years. It was never physical.. not even throwing things. I believe it is dependent on the person🤷‍♀️BUT I would never be in an emotional abusive relationship ever again. Has he gone to therapy? And marriage counseling?

Answer

Starts with emotional until they have broken you enough to know you won't leave when it gets physical.

Answer

Abuse is abuse...emotional or physical you deserve better! Get yourself outta there while you can

Answer

I was in an on and off again emotionally abusive relationship for years. ALL of my friends would ask, what’s it going to take for you to leave? Him hitting you? And I always said ohhhh he’d NEVER do that he’s a cop. Wrong-o. My absolute best friend stopped being my friend, she told me what happens if he DID hit me and she couldn’t save me or she couldn’t bring me back? The day he hit me was the day I left.
Moral of the story, leave now. I didn’t have a child. We miscarried due to abuse and I STAYED. Why? “Love”. You and your child deserve SO much more. It might hurt leaving, but babe I promise it’s worth it. ❤️❤️

Answer

Mine turned physical

Does it always turn physical?

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