My husband and I have been married for six months and are going through a rough patch. The first month and a half of our marriage was great. He was a loving husband and I was truly happy. He took a job, during the second month, and slowly I’ve seen him changing. I thought it was the job because in my mind that’s the only thing that changed.

He’s been doing pot, since he was a teen. He never considered himself an addict and promised me he’d stop once we got married. Well the first month, when things were good, he stopped the pot. He went back to it a couple weeks before he got his new job. When I found out he was using again, I became upset. I blamed it for the downfall in our marriage. He told me it wasn’t the pot because he uses it for pain. He told me things will get better. Well things did get better for some time but eventually it all went down again.

What I mean by down? I feel the last few months of our relationships were one sided. I put in the effort but he never did. I would text, start conversations, check in on him, and etc. I showed affection and bought him things. I pretty much was a loving caring wife to him. He hardly did anything for me. I could literally only name three different occasions were he showed interest. He never disrespected me but at times I just felt like he didn’t want to be with me. I would bring it up but he’d deny it. I hardly saw him and we hardly communicated. It bothered me but never seemed to phase him.

Well a week ago, he said something that upset me. And that was the last straw. I called him out on it and he finally admitted to me that he’s not happy. Not just in our marriage but his life itself. He feels lost and believes he wasn’t ready for marriage. He does not want to continue to ruin

my life. We decided to take a break, from our marriage for a month. We’d take the time to think things through. Well it’s been a week or so and again no text or calls. I’m not expecting them either. I think I did him the favor by separating for a month. He can finally live, as if he’s single. With no care in the world.

Should I continue to wait it out or give him some time? I just know I’m not going back to that version of him. It was miserable and I can’t do that myself again. I love myself too much to put my heart and mind through it all again!

BTW..before marriage he was doing pot. But he was a completely different person. Loving and fun to be around.