I’m scared to find out the gender. (TW)

I hope that it’s a boy. If it’s a girl... idk how I’ll get over it. i found out in 2 weeks. Let me explain.

I don’t feel okay bringing a little girl into this world. I went through a lot as a little girl, being sexually abused from ages 3-7, and the other day I read an article that 1 in 6 women have been raped. I could never live with myself knowing that it could possibly happen to my daughter if I had one. Is this wrong to think like this?

No matter the gender I will never leave my child in the care of someone else. Even family. I love my parents dearly and know they would NEVER do this, but it was my fathers dad who did those things to me. And nobody knew until 10 years after it happened. I just wouldn’t feel safe leaving them with someone without me knowing what’s happening. FTM here.