Paranoia after rape

Alora

I was raped pretty consistently from 16 to 17. I’ve only ever told a few people. I never turned him in, he was very manipulative and I was scared. It’s been 6 years and I’ve tried to move on from it. I know I can’t do it myself and I’m going to be looking into therapy as soon as I get my insurance cards. I’ve been having a lot of problems lately with paranoia, but not towards me. It’s my son. I guess I’m just so scared something will happen to him and I get paranoid and I think that I turn innocent things into something it’s not. Then freak out and put other things I turn into something it’s not, together. I have a secret paranoia that everyone around him will hurt him. I try to push it back and ignore it, sometimes I can and can’t. It’s getting to the point that I can’t trust my own father or my husband and I’m literally driving myself crazy. I went off on my husband tonight for just wrestling with him and playing. I’m not looking for medical advice, I know I need to talk to a professional, I’m just looking for advice from anyone that has gone through the same thing.