I was molested as a child and it gave me a warped sense of what sex was.

After being raped when I was 17, I retreated into taking all emotion out of sex. I don't do it to feel intimate. I don't like sex to feel sensual or romantic. I don't like it sweet and loving. I can't stand any of that. The last big emotions I had associatdd with sex were fear, guilt, shame, disgust. I was in therapy after the assaults, but it didn't really affect this way of coping. I became very sexually active after I hit 18. I became extremely submissive to it. The guy is always in control. I feel..sick about it. Like theres something wrong with that.

Whenever I speak with a therapist about it they always give me the same suggestions. But none of them work. As soon as sex feels emotional or romantic it makes me anxious and I clam up. Sex is just to get off, not to be romantic.

Its messing things up with my fiance. I don't know how to fix it. They want romantic, intimate, passionate sex. I don't know how to meet in the middle. We're getting married next month, I dont want to end it over something that just started being a problem in the last couple months.

Has anyone else struggled with this?