When i was 17 i had an abortion. I got pregnant 3 months after having my first (i had my first at 16) and i had really bad postpartum depression. My boyfriend at the time was abusive and wouldn’t help out with my first baby so I knew another baby wouldn’t be good. I was already struggling with the one i had and from the moment i found out i was pregnant I immediately thought of getting an abortion. I didnt want to be pregnant again, i was depressed, young, in a horrible relationship and I thought it was best. But everyone made me feel bad saying “you already had one, what’s another” or things along those lines. I delayed in getting an abortion because of this and when i got one I already knew the gender. I told people i miscarried because i knew they wouldnt be supportive of that decision. But i know the truth and i feel horrible for what i did. Even though i know i was not in a good place to have another baby i feel so guilty. Im 20 now and I’m not with my ex anymore. But everytime i look at my other daughter i just see and think of her sibling. I feel so alone still and somedays i wish i can go back in time and change what i did. I sometimes try to convince myself I miscarried but i know thats not true. It seems that no matter what i always think of what i did and i doubt ill ever get over it. I wish i could just forget.

Has anyone else ever felt this way for having an abortion? If so did you ever get over it? Or how do you cope?