I’ve been home alone and in bed all day. I had plans for the movies and dinner with my family, something I’ve been looking forward to all week, but that was quickly ruined by my own mind. I turned it down and now I’m left alone to cry. But Isn’t that what I wanted? To be left alone to sit in sadness without disturbance? Didn’t I make that decision? Or did my depression make it for me?

My boyfriend is asleep and none of my friends are answering... though it wouldn’t do me any good if they did. They wouldn’t give me the time and effort that I do for them anyways.

I’m mentally exhausted. Sometimes I wish I could get pulled into a book or be taken by a stranger just to shake my life up a little bit.