First off, I’m sorry I need a place to let it all out, to bitch, to throw a fit, to let out my frustration...I talk to NO ONE about anything...I try to hold it all in...I am constantly at my man (boy🙄) allllll the time texting him how I’m fed up , I text freakin paragraphs expressing shit and he doesn’t even read it!! This is almost a daily thing...he has put me through a lot in the past...lied to my face about seeing other girls..going out sleeping with another girl while still pursuing in me after I left him:..a year later we started seeing one another I got pregnant immediately..we now have a 1 month old daughter that he has nothing to do with ...we also have a 3 year old son together...lately he’s been doing things that’s reflecting him in the past...he’s hanging around a dude that’s helped him get to other women and go against me in the past also has him working for him now...he went out riding the streets of Atlanta with this guy the other night first said he was going alone ...turned into going with this guy to it turning into a group of people he “didn’t know” knew how upset I was I legit was having a mental break down over it until he got home at 1am a night! He didn’t even care he didn’t want to hear my “bullshit” so he slept on be couch ...yet if I were to go out he would expect to either be with me or not allow me to go out all night...there’s always something..he shows me no love...he doesn’t touch me...nothing I say or do gets across to him, he simply shows no emotion and doesn’t care about me or anything I say..but once it’s something he doesn’t like he’s allowed to come at me and complain or speak up...if I do it’s bullshit and he doesn’t want to hear it...he legit ignores everything i say!!! I cooked (I always go all out to cook for him, making sure he comes home to a clean house , clean clothes etc) for him tonight and because I didn’t kiss his ass and dish his plate he is sleeping on the couch again...because once again he gets home and doesn’t want to listen to me vent.. all day he sits on his phone on social media... maybe text me 2 times ...doesn’t call me...but talks and text people all day long...I’m fucking always LAST...so he gets home and every night he grabs my laptop turns on YouTube watches annoying ass people’s lives on there with his back turned to me and throws a fit if I don’t rub his back! This guy doesn’t KISS me, he doesn’t compliment me...he doesn’t act attracted to me he walks in the house and says “what’s up” he always seems so stank faced when he’s around me like I ain’t shit to him...he doesn’t buy me shit (not that he has to) he doesn’t do ANYTHING FOR ME, never goes out of his way for me or our kids ....if I don’t give him his way right to the couch he goes and just leaves me...I feel so helpless...I keep telling him I’m going to leave and he shrugs it off...I’m so exhausted with this..I feel so alone...I could go to my moms but my oldest daughter from a previous is going to school in this area and I don’t want to look like a fool placing her somewhere else right now...I’m torn on what to do...I’m terrified to start all over...it’s like he purposely mistreats me he wanted me back so badly at first claimed he wanted to settle down and marry me but each month I resent him more and more...I just don’t understand why he can’t love me correctly...why he refuses to communicate and just expects himself to do whatever and me sit in the house taking care of the kids and not having a life and be all happy and calm...nothing makes sense. He’s rude to me, he’s disrespectful to me, why does he even want me here if this is how he treats me? What is he trying to solve ?!