Hi ladies,

I’ve been dating my boyfriend for about 5 months and things are going pretty good! He’s been supportive of my moving and wanting to change jobs and everything like that... but I’m worried he thinks sex is a requirement any time we see each other.

Before I moved into my new house, we would try and meet up midweek halfway between our cities and then he would come out for the weekend. Once I moved and didn’t have anyone to let my dog out to go potty, his first reaction was “guess we can’t hangout midweek anymore since we won’t be able to stay overnight in a hotel”. After some conversation, he changed what he said to allow for midweek, just sad that we wouldn’t really have the hotel option if we drank too much.

But I moved almost two months ago and we haven’t had a midweek meetup at all... and this weekend he had a very mild case of pinkeye and I was adamant that he couldn’t kiss me/get his face too close to mine because I didn’t want to catch it. By the end of the weekend, he was trying so hard for sex (just a lot of “come onnnnn babe” and trying to touch me) that I gave in. We fell asleep and he left after.

Tonight he was supposed to come by after dropping his friend off at the airport to take a look at my car and cook dinner with me. He had had a few drinks before I got off work so he was pretty tired when he got to my place and said he wasn’t feeling up to cooking because he just wanted to get home but that he’d look at my car for me beforehand... I made a few drinks and a quick dinner and he ended up staying to eat and then tried to move things into the bedroom... which really annoyed me for some reason. I think it was because when he decided sex was on the table, all of a sudden he was willing to stay longer? I have dated guys in the past that were pushy/way too obsessed with sex so and I’ve told him I have some weird hang ups around sex in the past so I don’t think it’s fair of him to be annoyed at me for turning him down. When I first turned him down, he got very defensive and kept saying “you know I’m not just with you for sex” and “I don’t get why you’re mad at me for wanting to have sex with you, sex is a big part of a relationship”, etc. I tried to explain that it wasn’t so much that he wanted sex but that sex was his motivator to hang out with me longer. We ended up both just being frustrated at one another for 10 minutes. I eventually just told him that I wanted him to respond with an apology or asking what he could do to help instead of acting I was mad. After that he asked what I wanted him to do and told me he valued me and that I was his favorite person. He’s been trying to get me to tell him I love him lately so I’m not sure if that has something to do with this too?

Sorry for the novel but I’d appreciate opinions!

Thanks!