Okay so, hello ladies first and foremost. Deep breath lol I feel a rant coming on. Here it goes, so my fiancé and I were having a difficult time these past few weeks. A lot of little disagreements that turned into drawn out arguments. Things of that nature. So when we decided to sit down and talk she hits me with the “I don’t think we should have kids” um TF. WHAT DO YOU MEAN? That was a really hard hit for me. After we lost our daughter last December at 40+4 weeks ( I carried) it was always a plan for us to continue to keep trying. This time with her carrying. So finally we tried in February of this year and load and behold she was pregnant. Thank god our prayers have been answered, right? Wrong. Unfortunately she miscarried in March. Ugh. That knocked us off a lot to say the least. But we got back up took some time off and tried again. We tried June, July, & august with no luck. We move into our new place and start looking for a new begins but we started to fight more than usual...back to the conversation so it all boiled down to her not wanting to keep being disappointed due to the fact the she was trying before we even got together so it was a little harder for her to pick up and keep going. Me on the other hand will never give up but granted I just started trying so that was conflicting. Any-who that kinda fucked my head up like we got into this relationship talking about marriage and kids and now we shouldn’t?! I really haven’t been sleep much since that conversation. Fast forward to this past weekend. We both were off so naturally we planned to spend whole day out Saturday and the whole day in Sunday (the eagles play 💚) that was amazing we talked and really seen each other and what we wanted as partners. Last night as we layed cuddled up on the couch. She turns to me and says...”You ready to have these babies? I think it’s time!” My heart dropped and I cried real life baby tears I never seen it coming we haven’t even talked about it I couldn’t believe it came out her. So pure so sincere I couldn’t contain my emotions. Plus I’m on cycle day 5 so... but with all that being said. Were preparing to try again!!! I’m so excited. I’ll be carrying so I wanna try after our daughters first birthday December 25th. According to 𝘎𝘭𝘰 I ovulate on New Year’s <a href="https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.glow.android.eve">Eve</a> so this should be interesting. For now starting to eat right go to the gym and making doctors appointment so I’m automatically high risked. Thank you for listening. I will be sure to keep you guys posted and walk you through this journey.