Don’t tell anyone what names you are thinking of! (Not unless you get them to promise not to make negative comments, claim they have dibs on the name, etc... even then you have been warned)

The best time to announce your name choice to most friends and family is after it is on the birth certificate. Why? People can not stop from giving opinions. People will say “Oh no, not Monica... there was a girl who bullied me in sixth grade named Monica. Uhg! I will always think of her if you do.” Or they will tell you the name is over used, or they will say they don’t like it, or that name sound like the evil character in a movie, or they will give a subtile “Ben? Really? Well... he’s your baby *sigh*”, etc, etc. And then there is the friend/sister that will claim they had ALWAYS planned on using the name Grenabalina! That was to be their baby’s name! You made it up? Impossible! They heard it in a dream and love it! You have to chose another.

... and on and on....

I see so many stories on Glow and other places, where expectant mother’s are upset because they told someone a name and now said person is ruining it because of comments, or causing drama because they wanted it.

With my first pregnancy I tried to avoid this and some people STILL found a way to say something negative! I told an aquaintence, who asked, that I didn’t want to tell people our list of names because I didn’t want this kind of influence. She proceeds to say, “Oh I totally respect that. People are too opinionated and judgy when it comes to names.” In the same breath then she says, “Just don’t give him and Old Testament name. Those names are too trendy right now.” Yeah... we had two “Old Testament” names on the list. One because it was my father’s, grandfathers, and great-grand father’s name... but thank you random person for speaking up on that...

Of course... do as you wish but, this was some of the best advice given to me early on in my first pregnancy. I would say the only time to ask advice is for things like “will this name mess up my child for life?” Like if you are legitimately concerned your name is too out there, or if it rhymes with something nasty that kids can make fun of. Or of course if you really want opinions, negative or not. But I suggest not sharing the short list of names you just love and are sure you will pick from.