I regret telling my boyfriend that he should ask for help, or talk to his parents. He wanted a new car so I told him to ask his dad if he didn’t mind helping him because all he can do is say no or yes. Well it turned into this big lecture of how I’m not working (job says I need to have my doctor fill out documents which I have no idea if it’s going to cost money.) his parents ask constantly about the job, and I’m tired of it. I feel like shit enough. I feel like a failure and have no skills. No one around here wants to hire a pregnant woman. We only have one car which is why I had to quit my other job when we moved.

The only option I have is to do Lyft, but we have to sneak around for me to do it. He’s not supposed to let anyone drive it unless it’s his dad(his dad co-signed the car and that was his rule.) it’s the only way I can make money. My boyfriend doesn’t want me to go into stripping because I’ve told him I could do that so we can have money. The more I said it he came to realize he didn’t want me to do that at all. Which is why he suggested I do Lyft to make money. He put me on his insurance ,and I’ve been approved to drive for them.

I feel like when his parents talk to him, it makes him feel like a child. I feel bad for suggesting he opens up to them.

I just feel judgement everywhere whether it’s at him or me.

I’m trying so hard to not cut myself and I hate feeling this way. I feel like I should see a therapist but they’re expensive.